Will you come to the end of your life wishing you had done something else? The Daily Minder’s recent
post on Precious Human Life started me thinking about the choices that guarantee a life of full aliveness.
The PM and Personal Oomph
A project manager is by definition a leader. That personal essence that she brings into everything she does will speak louder than anything else she may wish to communicate.
Your personal oomph can be clarified and turbo-charged by making what I call a 7-fold commitment to your life.
What is a 7-fold commitment to life?
A 7-fold commitment is your scope statement for an excellent life. By making these seven choices you are
embracing your situation, whatever it may be. You are easily orienting yourself towards action and starting to naturally eliminate any feelings of powerlessness. Over time, you will find that everything has changed from the inside out.
Here are the seven choices which make up a 7-fold commitment to life:
Choice 1. Commit Yourself to Service
There are a lot of misconceptions about service. Some wonderful (and some not-so-wonderful) people believe that service is about giving something up or sacrificing yourself. This is not what I’m talking about.
Committing yourself to service is about dedicating yourself to being fully in the world. It’s about doing the same things you are doing now, but with a crucial difference.
Intend everything you do to be for the good of yourself and everyone involved.
Choice 2. Be Real.
Be Your True Self.
- Are you the same person at work as you are with your friends?
- How often do you say one thing when you really believe another?
Being yourself is a better gift to the people you spend time
with than anything else you could give or do. You may have
many seemingly valid reasons why this won’t work for you in your
particular situation. I suggest that the more steps
you take to be genuine in all situations, the more effective and
happier you will be.
Like all 7 commitments, the power of this choice is discovered through the doing (i.e. trying it out for yourself).
Dedicate yourself to being authentic.
Choice 3. Know Your Real Strengths
To be truly alive requires an accurate assessment of your true
strengths. Fortunately this is easier than many people make
it out to be. Here are some very good ways:
- What things do you enjoy doing?
- What things are easy for you and hard for others?
- What would the people who know you well say are your
strengths?
Be honest with yourself.
What if you don’t have any strengths
Everyone has many strengths.
If you struggle with depression, discouragement, or self-confidence issues, you are not alone. Some therapists believe that up to 10 percent of adults in the US may be depressed at any given time. (NIMH on depression
.)
Therapy, exercise, diet, and activity can all be helpful.
Certainly, if you are seriously sad or discouraged you should seek help as soon as possible.
Having a true understanding of your strengths and making a concerted effort to develop these to the best of your ability may open up a whole world of life for you.
Isn’t it better to focus on my weaknesses?
While there is something tobe gained in identifying and trying
to improve in areas of weakness, most people will
better
spend their time focusing on building their strengths.
When your work does not match your strengths
Being in work for which you are not suited can be one of the most
soul-killing experiences in life.
If you don’t see a connection between your work and your strengths, it
may be that you are fully unsuited to what you’re doing. It’s
more likely that you are not seeing your strengths accurately.
This is a common issue.
Most of us are oblivious to our gifts most of the time. If
you are truly in work which is not suitable for you, there is hope.
Start giving yourself fully to your current job no matter
what. Identifying and focusing on anything at all that you
enjoy about your work may help.
Effortless Power
When you spend most of your time doing those things that are natural
for you, you become
target=”_blank”>effortlessly powerful.
Decide to live from your real strengths.
Choice 4. Do the Things You Would Do If You Only Had One Year To Live.
Steven Levine once wrote an interesting book on this subject. Randy Pausch spoke about living your childhood dreams.
This choice is about making a clear commitment to do those things which are calling out for your attention.
What are the things that you have been putting off?
Today is your day to choose the things you want to do with
the time you have left.
- My friend S has a book on her desk,
target=”_blank”>10,000 places to visit before you die.
She is well on her way to doing the things that
resonate with her soul. - M always wanted to help people. She found a
way to get the training to do
so.
Doing the things you dream about eliminates
regret. It opens
doors and possibilities that would not otherwise be there.
This is how life seems to work
When we move in the direction of the things that give us joy, we
are prepared and presented with things that can increase our pleasure
in life even more.
Choice 5. Decide on a Primary Life Focus
If you are like most project managers, work may very well be your
primary area of focus. Is
this what you want your primary life focus to be?
Conscious choice is the essence of choice 5.
Your primary life focus can change over time - but it is important to
have one. This is where you are focusing your most important
life energy. If this area is not your work, then you should
spend time every day making a point of doing something towards the area
of your primary life focus.
Your focus in not about service. It’s about what you want to
be a fundamental part of your life right now. I believe that
any focus you come up with is the right one.
Examples
- Being a good friend
- Publishing your novel
- Running a Marathon
- Earning $2M
My friend R, a successful IT Security Officer, gives a good effort
to work - but his primary focus is his family. As he said to
me once,
“My real day begins when I open the front door at the end of the
afternoon.”
But I have many areas of focus in my life
Choose one. Unified, consistent focus is a
key aspect of power.
Choice 6. Pick a Way to Serve that Appeals to You
If you are clear about your commitment to service by being who
you truly are, and have identified a
primary focus for your life, a next choice is pick a way to serve
through specific actions.
It’s easy to get stuck on this choice. I truly believe that
being authentically yourself is the
most important service that you can render. True service is
never forced nor is it out of any kind of complusion. In
fact, such service is of little value, and will do nothing to better
your life.
If you choose to serve through action
You may have an idea in your mind right now about something that you would like to do for others. For Anita this was Meals on Wheels. For another friend, it’s raising money to reduce the suffering of others.
If you can join your service to your primary area focus, you will be well on the way to having a remarkable
life.
Choice 7. Treasure the People in Your Life
Who are the people who make
your life rich? Value them. Be grateful every single day…
Conclusion: Your Fantastic Life
Make these 7 choices and I promise you that your life will have a renewed richness and timbre that you may find hard to believe.
Who are the people in your life who are most alive? What might they say to this list? Let me know in the comments.
I’d really like to hear from you.
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{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
Thanks for the link.
I think number six appeals to me the most. But, it is easier said than done!
Great post.
TDM
TDM - True.
Honored to have you reading here and thanks for your kind comments.
Alec